WOMEN IN ISLAM
VERSUS
WOMEN IN THE JUDAEO-CHRISTIAN TRADITION
BY Dr. Sherif Abdel Azeem
1.
INTRODUCTION
Five years ago, I read in
the Toronto Star issue of July 3, 1990 an article titled "Islam
is not alone in patriarchal doctrines", by Gwynne Dyer. The
article described the furious reactions of the participants of a
conference on women and power held in Montreal to the comments
of the famous Egyptian feminist Dr. Nawal Saadawi. Her
"politically incorrect" statements included : "the most
restrictive elements towards women can be found first in Judaism
in the Old Testament then in Christianity and then in the Quran";
"all religions are patriarchal because they stem from
patriarchal societies"; and "veiling of women is not a
specifically Islamic practice but an ancient cultural heritage
with analogies in sister religions". The participants could not
bear sitting around while their faiths were being equated with
Islam. Thus, Dr. Saadawi received a barrage of criticism. "Dr.
Saadawi's comments are unacceptable. Her answers reveal a lack
of understanding about other people's faiths," declared Bernice
Dubois of the World Movement of Mothers. "I must protest" said
panellist Alice Shalvi of Israel women's network, "there is no
conception of the veil in Judaism." The article attributed these
furious protests to the strong tendency in the West to scapegoat
Islam for practices that are just as much a part of the West's
own cultural heritage. "Christian and Jewish feminists were not
going to sit around being discussed in the same category as
those wicked Muslims," wrote Gwynne Dyer.
I was not surprised that
the conference participants had held such a negative view of
Islam, especially when women's issues were involved. In the
West, Islam is believed to be the symbol of the subordination of
women par excellence. In order to understand how firm
this belief is, it is enough to mention that the Minister of
Education in France, the land of Voltaire, has recently ordered
the expulsion of all young Muslim women wearing the veil from
French schools!1 A young Muslim student wearing a headscarf is
denied her right of education in France, while a Catholic
student wearing a cross or a Jewish student wearing a skullcap
is not. The scene of French policemen preventing young Muslim
women wearing headscarves from entering their high school is
unforgettable. It inspires the memories of another equally
disgraceful scene of Governor George Wallace of Alabama in 1962
standing in front of a school gate trying to block the entrance
of black students in order to prevent the desegregation of
Alabama's schools. The difference between the two scenes is that
the black students had the sympathy of so many people in the
U.S. and in the whole world. President Kennedy sent the U.S.
National Guard to force the entry of the black students. The
Muslim girls, on the other hand, received no help from any one.
Their cause seems to have very little sympathy either inside or
outside France. The reason is the widespread misunderstanding
and fear of anything Islamic in the world today.
What intrigued me the most
about the Montreal conference was one question : Were the
statements made by Saadawi, or any of her critics, factual ? In
other words, do Judaism, Christianity, and Islam have the same
conception of women? Are they different in their conceptions ?
Do Judaism and Christianity , truly, offer women a better
treatment than Islam does? What is the Truth?
It is not easy to search
for and find answers to these difficult questions. The first
difficulty is that one has to be fair and objective or, at
least, do one's utmost to be so. This is what Islam teaches. The
Quran has instructed Muslims to say the truth even if those who
are very close to them do not like it: "Whenever you speak,
speak justly, even if a near relative is concerned" (6:152) "O
you who believe stand out firmly for justice, as witnesses to
Allah, even as against yourselves, or your parents or your kin,
and whether it be (against) rich or poor" (4:135).
The other great difficulty
is the overwhelming breadth of the subject. Therefore, during
the last few years, I have spent many hours reading the Bible,
The Encyclopaedia of Religion, and the Encyclopaedia Judaica
searching for answers. I have also read several books discussing
the position of women in different religions written by
scholars, apologists, and critics. The material presented in the
following chapters represents the important findings of this
humble research. I don't claim to be absolutely objective. This
is beyond my limited capacity. All I can say is that I have been
trying, throughout this research, to approach the Quranic ideal
of "speaking justly".
I would like to emphasize
in this introduction that my purpose for this study is not to
denigrate Judaism or Christianity. As Muslims, we believe in the
divine origins of both. No one can be a Muslim without believing
in Moses and Jesus as great prophets of God. My goal is only to
vindicate Islam and pay a tribute, long overdue in the West, to
the final truthful Message from God to the human race. I would
also like to emphasize that I concerned myself only with
Doctrine. That is, my concern is, mainly, the position of women
in the three religions as it appears in their original sources
not as practised by their millions of followers in the world
today. Therefore, most of the evidence cited comes from the
Quran, the sayings of Prophet Muhammad, the Bible, the Talmud,
and the sayings of some of the most influential Church Fathers
whose views have contributed immeasurably to defining and
shaping Christianity. This interest in the sources relates to
the fact that understanding a certain religion from the
attitudes and the behaviour of some of its nominal followers is
misleading. Many people confuse culture with religion, many
others do not know what their religious books are saying, and
many others do not even care.
2.
EVE'S FAULT
?
The three religions agree
on one basic fact: Both women and men are created by God, The
Creator of the whole universe. However, disagreement starts soon
after the creation of the first man, Adam, and the first woman,
Eve. The Judaeo-Christian conception of the creation of Adam and
Eve is narrated in detail in Genesis 2:4-3:24. God prohibited
both of them from eating the fruits of the forbidden tree. The
serpent seduced Eve to eat from it and Eve, in turn, seduced
Adam to eat with her. When God rebuked Adam for what he did, he
put all the blame on Eve, "The woman you put here with me --she
gave me some fruit from the tree and I ate it." Consequently,
God said to Eve:
"I will greatly
increase your pains in childbearing; with pain you will give
birth to children. Your desire will be for your husband and he
will rule over you."
To Adam He said:
"Because you listened
to your wife and ate from the tree .... Cursed is the ground
because of you; through painful toil you will eat of it all the
days of your life..."
The Islamic conception of
the first creation is found in several places in the Quran, for
example:
"O Adam dwell with your
wife in the Garden and enjoy as you wish but approach not this
tree or you run into harm and transgression. Then Satan
whispered to them in order to reveal to them their shame that
was hidden from them and he said: 'Your Lord only forbade you
this tree lest you become angels or such beings as live
forever.' And he swore to them both that he was their sincere
adviser. So by deceit he brought them to their fall: when they
tasted the tree their shame became manifest to them and they
began to sew together the leaves of the Garden over their
bodies. And their Lord called unto them: 'Did I not forbid you
that tree and tell you that Satan was your avowed enemy?' They
said: 'Our Lord we have wronged our own souls and if You forgive
us not and bestow not upon us Your Mercy, we shall certainly be
lost' " (7:19:23).
A careful look into the
two accounts of the story of the Creation reveals some essential
differences. The Quran, contrary to the Bible, places equal
blame on both Adam and Eve for their mistake. Nowhere in the
Quran can one find even the slightest hint that Eve tempted Adam
to eat from the tree or even that she had eaten before him. Eve
in the Quran is no temptress, no seducer, and no deceiver.
Moreover, Eve is not to be blamed for the pains of childbearing.
God, according to the Quran, punishes no one for another's
faults. Both Adam and Eve committed a sin and then asked God for
forgiveness and He forgave them both.
3.
EVE'S LEGACY
The image of Eve as
temptress in the Bible has resulted in an extremely negative
impact on women throughout the Judaeo-Christian tradition. All
women were believed to have inherited from their mother, the
Biblical Eve, both her guilt and her guile. Consequently, they
were all untrustworthy, morally inferior, and wicked.
Menstruation, pregnancy, and childbearing were considered the
just punishment for the eternal guilt of the cursed female sex.
In order to appreciate how negative the impact of the Biblical
Eve was on all her female descendants we have to look at the
writings of some of the most important Jews and Christians of
all time. Let us start with the Old Testament and look at
excerpts from what is called the Wisdom Literature in which we
find:
"I find more bitter
than death the woman who is a snare, whose heart is a trap and
whose hands are chains. The man who pleases God will escape her,
but the sinner she will ensnare....while I was still searching
but not finding, I found one upright man among a thousand but
not one upright woman among them all" (Ecclesiastes 7:26-28).
In another part of the
Hebrew literature which is found in the Catholic Bible we read:
"No wickedness comes
anywhere near the wickedness of a woman.....Sin began with a
woman and thanks to her we all must die" (Ecclesiasticus
25:19,24).
Jewish Rabbis listed nine
curses inflicted on women as a result of the Fall:
"To the woman He gave
nine curses and death: the burden of the blood of menstruation
and the blood of virginity; the burden of pregnancy; the burden
of childbirth; the burden of bringing up the children; her head
is covered as one in mourning; she pierces her ear like a
permanent slave or slave girl who serves her master; she is not
to be believed as a witness; and after everything--death." 2
To the present day,
orthodox Jewish men in their daily morning prayer recite
"Blessed be God King of the universe that Thou has not made me a
woman." The women, on the other hand, thank God every morning
for "making me according to Thy will." 3 Another prayer found in
many Jewish prayer books: "Praised be God that he has not
created me a gentile. Praised be God that he has not created me
a woman. Praised be God that he has not created me an
ignoramus." 4
The Biblical Eve has
played a far bigger role in Christianity than in Judaism. Her
sin has been pivotal to the whole Christian faith because the
Christian conception of the reason for the mission of Jesus
Christ on Earth stems from Eve's disobedience to God. She had
sinned and then seduced Adam to follow her suit. Consequently,
God expelled both of them from Heaven to Earth, which had been
cursed because of them. They bequeathed their sin, which had not
been forgiven by God, to all their descendants and, thus, all
humans are born in sin. In order to purify human beings from
their 'original sin', God had to sacrifice Jesus, who is
considered to be the Son of God, on the cross. Therefore, Eve is
responsible for her own mistake, her husband's sin, the original
sin of all humanity, and the death of the Son of God. In other
words, one woman acting on her own caused the fall of humanity.
5 What about her daughters? They are sinners like her and have
to be treated as such. Listen to the severe tone of St. Paul in
the New Testament:
"A woman should learn
in quietness and full submission. I don't permit a woman to
teach or to have authority over a man; she must be silent. For
Adam was formed first, then Eve. And Adam was not the one
deceived; it was the woman who was deceived and became a sinner"
(I Timothy 2:11-14).
St. Tertullian was even
more blunt than St. Paul, while he was talking to his 'best
beloved sisters' in the faith, he said: 6
"Do you not know that
you are each an Eve? The sentence of God on this sex of yours
lives in this age: the guilt must of necessity live too. You are
the Devil's gateway: You are the unsealer of the forbidden tree:
You are the first deserter of the divine law: You are she who
persuaded him whom the devil was not valiant enough to attack.
You destroyed so easily God's image, man. On account of your
desert even the Son of God had to die."
St. Augustine was faithful
to the legacy of his predecessors, he wrote to a friend:
"What is the difference
whether it is in a wife or a mother, it is still Eve the
temptress that we must beware of in any woman......I fail to see
what use woman can be to man, if one excludes the function of
bearing children."
Centuries later, St.
Thomas Aquinas still considered women as defective:
"As regards the
individual nature, woman is defective and misbegotten, for the
active force in the male seed tends to the production of a
perfect likeness in the masculine sex; while the production of
woman comes from a defect in the active force or from some
material indisposition, or even from some external influence."
Finally, the renowned
reformer Martin Luther could not see any benefit from a woman
but bringing into the world as many children as possible
regardless of any side effects:
"If they become tired
or even die, that does not matter. Let them die in childbirth,
that's why they are there"
Again and again all women
are denigrated because of the image of Eve the temptress, thanks
to the Genesis account. To sum up, the Judaeo-Christian
conception of women has been poisoned by the belief in the
sinful nature of Eve and her female offspring.
If we now turn our
attention to what the Quran has to say about women, we will soon
realize that the Islamic conception of women is radically
different from the Judaeo-Christian one. Let the Quran speak for
itself:
"For Muslim men and
women, for believing men and women, for devout men and women,
for true men and women, for men and women who are patient, for
men and women who humble themselves, for men and women who give
in charity, for men and women who fast, for men and women who
guard their chastity, and for men and women who engage much in
Allah's praise-- For them all has Allah prepared forgiveness and
great reward" (33:35).
"The believers, men and
women, are protectors, one of another: they enjoin what is just,
and forbid what is evil, they observe regular prayers, practise
regular charity, and obey Allah and His Messenger. On them will
Allah pour His Mercy: for Allah is Exalted in power, Wise"
(9:71).
"And their Lord
answered them: Truly I will never cause to be lost the work of
any of you, Be you a male or female, you are members one of
another" (3:195).
"Whoever works evil
will not be requited but by the like thereof, and whoever works
a righteous deed -whether man or woman- and is a believer- such
will enter the Garden of bliss" (40:40).
"Whoever works
righteousness, man or woman, and has faith, verily to him/her we
will give a new life that is good and pure, and we will bestow
on such their reward according to the best of their actions"
(16:97).
It is clear that the
Quranic view of women is no different than that of men. They,
both, are God's creatures whose sublime goal on earth is to
worship their Lord, do righteous deeds, and avoid evil and they,
both, will be assessed accordingly. The Quran never mentions
that the woman is the devil's gateway or that she is a deceiver
by nature. The Quran, also, never mentions that man is God's
image; all men and all women are his creatures, that is all.
According to the Quran, a woman's role on earth is not limited
only to childbirth. She is required to do as many good deeds as
any other man is required to do. The Quran never says that no
upright women have ever existed. To the contrary, the Quran has
instructed all the believers, women as well as men, to follow
the example of those ideal women such as the Virgin Mary and the
Pharoah's wife:
"And Allah sets forth,
As an example to those who believe, the wife of Pharaoh: Behold
she said: 'O my lord build for me, in nearness to you, a mansion
in the Garden, and save me from Pharaoh and his doings and save
me from those who do wrong.' And Mary the daughter of Imran who
guarded her chastity and We breathed into her body of Our
spirit; and she testified to the truth of the words of her Lord
and of His revelations and was one of the devout" (66:11-13).
4.
SHAMEFUL
DAUGHTERS ?
In fact, the difference
between the Biblical and the Quranic attitude towards the female
sex starts as soon as a female is born. For example, the Bible
states that the period of the mother's ritual impurity is twice
as long if a girl is born than if a boy is (Lev. 12:2-5). The
Catholic Bible states explicitly that:
"The birth of a
daughter is a loss" (Ecclesiasticus 22:3).
In contrast to this
shocking statement, boys receive special praise:
"A man who educates his
son will be the envy of his enemy." (Ecclesiasticus 30:3)
Jewish Rabbis made it an
obligation on Jewish men to produce offspring in order to
propagate the race. At the same time, they did not hide their
clear preference for male children : "It is well for those whose
children are male but ill for those whose are female", "At the
birth of a boy, all are joyful...at the birth of a girl all are
sorrowful", and "When a boy comes into the world, peace comes
into the world... When a girl comes, nothing comes."7
A daughter is considered a
painful burden, a potential source of shame to her father:
"Your daughter is
headstrong? Keep a sharp look-out that she does not make you the
laughing stock of your enemies, the talk of the town, the object
of common gossip, and put you to public shame" (Ecclesiasticus
42:11).
"Keep a headstrong
daughter under firm control, or she will abuse any indulgence
she receives. Keep a strict watch on her shameless eye, do not
be surprised if she disgraces you" (Ecclesiasticus 26:10-11).
It was this very same idea
of treating daughters as sources of shame that led the pagan
Arabs, before the advent of Islam, to practice female
infanticide. The Quran severely condemned this heinous practice:
"When news is brought
to one of them of the birth of a female child, his face darkens
and he is filled with inward grief. With shame does he hide
himself from his people because of the bad news he has had!
Shall he retain her on contempt or bury her in the dust? Ah!
what an evil they decide on?" (16:59).
It has to be mentioned
that this sinister crime would have never stopped in Arabia were
it not for the power of the scathing terms the Quran used to
condemn this practice (16:59, 43:17, 81:8-9). The Quran,
moreover, makes no distinction between boys and girls. In
contrast to the Bible, the Quran considers the birth of a female
as a gift and a blessing from God, the same as the birth of a
male. The Quran even mentions the gift of the female birth
first:
" To Allah belongs the
dominion of the heavens and the earth. He creates what He wills.
He bestows female children to whomever He wills and bestows male
children to whomever He wills" (42:49).
In order to wipe out all
the traces of female infanticide in the nascent Muslim society,
Prophet Muhammad promised those who were blessed with daughters
of a great reward if they would bring them up kindly:
"He who is involved in
bringing up daughters, and accords benevolent treatment towards
them, they will be protection for him against Hell-Fire" (Bukhari
and Muslim).
"Whoever maintains two
girls till they attain maturity, he and I will come on the
Resurrection Day like this; and he joined his fingers" (Muslim).
5.
FEMALE
EDUCATION ?
The difference between the
Biblical and the Quranic conceptions of women is not limited to
the newly born female, it extends far beyond that. Let us
compare their attitudes towards a female trying to learn her
religion. The heart of Judaism is the Torah, the law. However,
according to the Talmud, "women are exempt from the study of the
Torah." Some Jewish Rabbis firmly declared "Let the words of
Torah rather be destroyed by fire than imparted to women", and
"Whoever teaches his daughter Torah is as though he taught her
obscenity"8
The attitude of St. Paul
in the New Testament is not brighter:
"As in all the
congregations of the saints, women should remain silent in the
churches. They are not allowed to speak, but must be in
submission as the law says. If they want to inquire about
something, they should ask their own husbands at home; for it is
disgraceful for a woman to speak in the church." (I Corinthians
14:34-35)
How can a woman learn if
she is not allowed to speak? How can a woman grow intellectually
if she is obliged to be in a state of full submission? How can
she broaden her horizons if her one and only source of
information is her husband at home?
Now, to be fair, we should
ask: is the Quranic position any different? One short story
narrated in the Quran sums its position up concisely. Khawlah
was a Muslim woman whose husband Aws pronounced this statement
at a moment of anger: "You are to me as the back of my mother."
This was held by pagan Arabs to be a statement of divorce which
freed the husband from any conjugal responsibility but did not
leave the wife free to leave the husband's home or to marry
another man. Having heard these words from her husband, Khawlah
was in a miserable situation. She went straight to the Prophet
of Islam to plead her case. The Prophet was of the opinion that
she should be patient since there seemed to be no way out.
Khawla kept arguing with the Prophet in an attempt to save her
suspended marriage. Shortly, the Quran intervened; Khawla's plea
was accepted. The divine verdict abolished this iniquitous
custom. One full chapter (Chapter 58) of the Quran whose title
is "Almujadilah" or "The woman who is arguing" was named after
this incident:
"Allah has heard and
accepted the statement of the woman who pleads with you (the
Prophet) concerning her husband and carries her complaint to
Allah, and Allah hears the arguments between both of you for
Allah hears and sees all things...." (58:1).
A woman in the Quranic
conception has the right to argue even with the Prophet of Islam
himself. No one has the right to instruct her to be silent. She
is under no obligation to consider her husband the one and only
reference in matters of law and religion.
6.
UNCLEAN
IMPURE WOMAN ?
Jewish laws and
regulations concerning menstruating women are extremely
restrictive. The Old Testament considers any menstruating woman
as unclean and impure. Moreover, her impurity "infects" others
as well. Anyone or anything she touches becomes unclean for a
day:
"When a woman has her
regular flow of blood, the impurity of her monthly period will
last seven days, and anyone who touches her will be unclean till
evening. Anything she lies on during her period will be unclean,
and anything she sits on will be unclean. Whoever touches her
bed must wash his clothes and bathe with water, and he will be
unclean till evening. Whoever touches anything she sits on must
wash his clothes and bathe with water, and he will be unclean
till evening. Whether it is the bed or anything she was sitting
on, when anyone touches it, he will be unclean till evening"
(Lev. 15:19-23).
Due to her "contaminating"
nature, a menstruating woman was sometimes "banished" in order
to avoid any possibility of any contact with her. She was sent
to a special house called "the house of uncleanness" for the
whole period of her impurity. 9 The Talmud considers a
menstruating woman "fatal" even without any physical contact:
"Our Rabbis
taught:....if a menstruant woman passes between two (men), if it
is at the beginning of her menses she will slay one of them, and
if it is at the end of her menses she will cause strife between
them" (bPes. 111a.)
Furthermore, the husband
of a menstruous woman was forbidden to enter the synagogue if he
had been made unclean by her even by the dust under her feet. A
priest whose wife, daughter, or mother was menstruating could
not recite priestly blessing in the synagogue. 10 No wonder many
Jewish women still refer to menstruation as "the curse." 11
Islam does not consider a
menstruating woman to possess any kind of "contagious
uncleanness". She is neither "untouchable" nor "cursed." She
practises her normal life with only one restriction: A married
couple are not allowed to have sexual intercourse during the
period of menstruation. Any other physical contact between them
is permissible. A menstruating woman is exempted from some
rituals such as daily prayers and fasting during her period.
7.
BEARING
WITNESS
Another issue in which the
Quran and the Bible disagree is the issue of women bearing
witness. It is true that the Quran has instructed the believers
dealing in financial transactions to get two male witnesses or
one male and two females (2:282). However, it is also true that
the Quran in other situations accepts the testimony of a woman
as equal to that of a man. In fact the woman's testimony can
even invalidate the man's. If a man accuses his wife of
unchastity, he is required by the Quran to solemnly swear five
times as evidence of the wife's guilt. If the wife denies and
swears similarly five times, she is not considered guilty and in
either case the marriage is dissolved (24:6-11).
On the other hand, women
were not allowed to bear witness in early Jewish society. 12 The
Rabbis counted women's not being able to bear witness among the
nine curses inflicted upon all women because of the Fall (see
the "Eve's Legacy" section). Women in today's Israel are not
allowed to give evidence in Rabbinical courts. 13 The Rabbis
justify why women cannot bear witness by citing Genesis 18:9-16,
where it is stated that Sara, Abraham's wife had lied. The
Rabbis use this incident as evidence that women are unqualified
to bear witness. It should be noted here that this story
narrated in Genesis 18:9-16 has been mentioned more than once in
the Quran without any hint of any lies by Sara (11:69-74,
51:24-30). In the Christian West, both ecclesiastical and civil
law debarred women from giving testimony until late last
century. 14
If a man accuses his wife
of unchastity, her testimony will not be considered at all
according to the Bible. The accused wife has to be subjected to
a trial by ordeal. In this trial, the wife faces a complex and
humiliating ritual which was supposed to prove her guilt or
innocence (Num. 5:11-31). If she is found guilty after this
ordeal, she will be sentenced to death. If she is found not
guilty, her husband will be innocent of any wrongdoing.
Besides, if a man takes a
woman as a wife and then accuses her of not being a virgin, her
own testimony will not count. Her parents had to bring evidence
of her virginity before the elders of the town. If the parents
could not prove the innocence of their daughter, she would be
stoned to death on her father's doorsteps. If the parents were
able to prove her innocence, the husband would only be fined one
hundred shekels of silver and he could not divorce his wife as
long as he lived:
"If a man takes a wife
and, after lying with her, dislikes her and slanders her and
gives her a bad name, saying, 'I married this woman, but when I
approached her, I did not find proof of her virginity,' then the
girl's father and mother shall bring proof that she was a virgin
to the town elders at the gate. The girl's father will say to
the elders, 'I gave my daughter in marriage to this man, but he
dislikes her. Now he has slandered her and said I did not find
your daughter to be a virgin. But here is the proof of my
daughter's virginity.' Then her parents shall display the cloth
before the elders of the town, and the elders shall take the man
and punish him. They shall fine him a hundred shekels of silver
and give them to the girl's father, because this man has given
an Israelite virgin a bad name. She shall continue to be his
wife; he must not divorce her as long as he lives. If, however,
the charge is true and no proof of the girl's virginity can be
found, she shall be brought to the door of her father's house
and there the men of the town shall stone her to death. She has
done a disgraceful thing in Israel by being promiscuous while
still in her father's house. You must purge the evil from among
you." (Deuteronomy 22:13-21)
8.
ADULTERY
Adultery is considered a
sin in all religions. The Bible decrees the death sentence for
both the adulterer and the adulteress (Lev. 20:10). Islam also
equally punishes both the adulterer and the adulteress (24:2).
However, the Quranic definition of adultery is very different
from the Biblical definition. Adultery, according to the Quran,
is the involvement of a married man or a married woman in an
extramarital affair. The Bible only considers the extramarital
affair of a married woman as adultery (Leviticus 20:10,
Deuteronomy 22:22, Proverbs 6:20-7:27).
"If a man is found
sleeping with another man's wife, both the man who slept with
her and the woman must die. You must purge the evil from Israel"
(Deut. 22:22).
"If a man commits
adultery with another man's wife both the adulterer and the
adulteress must be put to death" (Lev. 20:10).
According to the Biblical
definition, if a married man sleeps with an unmarried woman,
this is not considered a crime at all. The married man who has
extramarital affairs with unmarried women is not an adulterer
and the unmarried women involved with him are not adulteresses.
The crime of adultery is committed only when a man, whether
married or single, sleeps with a married woman. In this case the
man is considered adulterer, even if he is not married, and the
woman is considered adulteress. In short, adultery is any
illicit sexual intercourse involving a married woman. The
extramarital affair of a married man is not per se a crime in
the Bible. Why is the dual moral standard? According to
Encyclopaedia Judaica, the wife was considered to be the
husband's possession and adultery constituted a violation of the
husband's exclusive right to her; the wife as the husband's
possession had no such right to him. 15 That is, if a man had
sexual intercourse with a married woman, he would be violating
the property of another man and, thus, he should be punished.
To the present day in
Israel, if a married man indulges in an extramarital affair with
an unmarried woman, his children by that woman are considered
legitimate. But, if a married woman has an affair with another
man, whether married or not married, her children by that man
are not only illegitimate but they are considered bastards and
are forbidden to marry any other Jews except converts and other
bastards. This ban is handed down to the children's descendants
for 10 generations until the taint of adultery is presumably
weakened. 16
The Quran, on the other
hand, never considers any woman to be the possession of any man.
The Quran eloquently describes the relationship between the
spouses by saying:
" And among His signs
is that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that you
may dwell in tranquillity with them and He has put love and
mercy between your hearts: verily in that are signs for those
who reflect" (30:21).
This is the Quranic
conception of marriage: love, mercy, and tranquillity, not
possession and double standards.
9.
VOWS
According to the Bible, a
man must fulfil any vows he might make to God. He must not break
his word. On the other hand, a woman's vow is not necessarily
binding on her. It has to be approved by her father, if she is
living in his house, or by her husband, if she is married. If a
father/husband does not endorse his daughter's/wife's vows, all
pledges made by her become null and void:
"But if her father
forbids her when he hears about it, none of her vows or the
pledges by which she obligated herself will stand ....Her
husband may confirm or nullify any vow she makes or any sworn
pledge to deny herself" (Num. 30:2-15)
Why is it that a woman's
word is not binding per se ? The answer is simple: because she
is owned by her father, before marriage, or by her husband after
marriage. The father's control over his daughter was absolute to
the extent that, should he wish, he could sell her! It is
indicated in the writings of the Rabbis that: "The man may sell
his daughter, but the woman may not sell her daughter; the man
may betroth his daughter, but the woman may not betroth her
daughter." 17 The Rabbinic literature also indicates that
marriage represents the transfer of control from the father to
the husband: "betrothal, making a woman the sacrosanct
possession--the inviolable property-- of the husband..."
Obviously, if the woman is considered to be the property of
someone else, she cannot make any pledges that her owner does
not approve of.
It is of interest to note
that this Biblical instruction concerning women's vows has had
negative repercussions on Judaeo-Christian women till early in
this century. A married woman in the Western world had no legal
status. No act of hers was of any legal value. Her husband could
repudiate any contract, bargain, or deal she had made. Women in
the West (the largest heir of the Judaeo-Christian legacy) were
held unable to make a binding contract because they were
practically owned by someone else. Western women had suffered
for almost two thousand years because of the Biblical attitude
towards women's position vis-à-vis their fathers and husbands.
18
In Islam, the vow of every
Muslim, male or female, is binding on him/her. No one has the
power to repudiate the pledges of anyone else. Failure to keep a
solemn oath, made by a man or a woman, has to be expiated as
indicated in the Quran:
"He [God] will call you
to account for your deliberate oaths: for expiation, feed ten
indigent persons, on a scale of the average for the food of your
families; Or clothe them; or give a slave his freedom. If that
is beyond your means, fast for three days. That is the expiation
for the oaths you have sworn. But keep your oaths" (5:89).
Companions of the Prophet
Muhammad, men and women, used to present their oath of
allegiance to him personally. Women, as well as men, would
independently come to him and pledge their oaths:
"O Prophet, When
believing women come to you to make a covenant with you that
they will not associate in worship anything with God, nor steal,
nor fornicate, nor kill their own children, nor slander anyone,
nor disobey you in any just matter, then make a covenant with
them and pray to God for the forgiveness of their sins. Indeed
God is Forgiving and most Merciful" (60:12).
A man could not swear the
oath on behalf of his daughter or his wife. Nor could a man
repudiate the oath made by any of his female relatives.
10.
WIFE'S
PROPERTY ?
The three religions share
an unshakeable belief in the importance of marriage and family
life. They also agree on the leadership of the husband over the
family. Nevertheless, blatant differences do exist among the
three religions with respect to the limits of this leadership.
The Judaeo-Christian tradition, unlike Islam, virtually extends
the leadership of the husband into ownership of his wife.
The Jewish tradition
regarding the husband's role towards his wife stems from the
conception that he owns her as he owns his slave. 19 This
conception has been the reason behind the double standard in the
laws of adultery and behind the husband's ability to annul his
wife's vows. This conception has also been responsible for
denying the wife any control over her property or her earnings.
As soon as a Jewish woman got married, she completely lost any
control over her property and earnings to her husband. Jewish
Rabbis asserted the husband's right to his wife's property as a
corollary of his possession of her: "Since one has come into the
possession of the woman does it not follow that he should come
into the possession of her property too?", and "Since he has
acquired the woman should he not acquire also her property?" 20
Thus, marriage caused the richest woman to become practically
penniless. The Talmud describes the financial situation of a
wife as follows:
"How can a woman have
anything; whatever is hers belongs to her husband? What is his
is his and what is hers is also his...... Her earnings and what
she may find in the streets are also his. The household
articles, even the crumbs of bread on the table, are his. Should
she invite a guest to her house and feed him, she would be
stealing from her husband..." (San. 71a, Git. 62a)
The fact of the matter is
that the property of a Jewish female was meant to attract
suitors. A Jewish family would assign their daughter a share of
her father's estate to be used as a dowry in case of marriage.
It was this dowry that made Jewish daughters an unwelcome burden
to their fathers. The father had to raise his daughter for years
and then prepare for her marriage by providing a large dowry.
Thus, a girl in a Jewish family was a liability and no asset. 21
This liability explains why the birth of a daughter was not
celebrated with joy in the old Jewish society (see the "Shameful
Daughters?" section). The dowry was the wedding gift presented
to the groom under terms of tenancy. The husband would act as
the practical owner of the dowry but he could not sell it. The
bride would lose any control over the dowry at the moment of
marriage. Moreover, she was expected to work after marriage and
all her earnings had to go to her husband in return for her
maintenance which was his obligation. She could regain her
property only in two cases: divorce or her husband's death.
Should she die first, he would inherit her property. In the case
of the husband's death, the wife could regain her pre-marital
property but she was not entitled to inherit any share in her
deceased husband's own property. It has to be added that the
groom also had to present a marriage gift to his bride, yet
again he was the practical owner of this gift as long as they
were married. 22
Christianity, until
recently, has followed the same Jewish tradition. Both religious
and civil authorities in the Christian Roman Empire (after
Constantine) required a property agreement as a condition for
recognizing the marriage. Families offered their daughters
increasing dowries and, as a result, men tended to marry earlier
while families postponed their daughters' marriages until later
than had been customary. 23 Under Canon law, a wife was entitled
to restitution of her dowry if the marriage was annulled unless
she was guilty of adultery. In this case, she forfeited her
right to the dowry which remained in her husband's hands. 24
Under Canon and civil law a married woman in Christian Europe
and America had lost her property rights until late nineteenth
and early twentieth centuries. For example, women's rights under
English law were compiled and published in 1632. These 'rights'
included: "That which the husband hath is his own. That which
the wife hath is the husband's." 25 The wife not only lost her
property upon marriage, she lost her personality as well. No act
of her was of legal value. Her husband could repudiate any sale
or gift made by her as being of no binding legal value. The
person with whom she had any contract was held as a criminal for
participating in a fraud. Moreover, she could not sue or be sued
in her own name, nor could she sue her own husband. 26 A married
woman was practically treated as an infant in the eyes of the
law. The wife simply belonged to her husband and therefore she
lost her property, her legal personality, and her family name.
27
Islam, since the seventh
century C.E., has granted married women the independent
personality which the Judaeo-Christian West had deprived them
until very recently. In Islam, the bride and her family are
under no obligation whatsoever to present a gift to the groom.
The girl in a Muslim family is no liability. A woman is so
dignified by Islam that she does not need to present gifts in
order to attract potential husbands. It is the groom who must
present the bride with a marriage gift. This gift is considered
her property and neither the groom nor the bride's family have
any share in or control over it. In some Muslim societies today,
a marriage gift of a hundred thousand dollars in diamonds is not
unusual. 28 The bride retains her marriage gifts even if she is
later divorced. The husband is not allowed any share in his
wife's property except what she offers him with her free
consent. 29 The Quran has stated its position on this issue
quite clearly:
"And give the women (on
marriage) their dower as a free gift; but if they, Of their own
good pleasure, remit any part of it to you, take it and enjoy it
with right good cheer" (4:4)
The wife's property and
earnings are under her full control and for her use alone since
her, and the children's, maintenance is her husband's
responsibility. 30 No matter how rich the wife might be, she is
not obliged to act as a co-provider for the family unless she
herself voluntarily chooses to do so. Spouses do inherit from
one another. Moreover, a married woman in Islam retains her
independent legal personality and her family name. 31 An
American judge once commented on the rights of Muslim women
saying: " A Muslim girl may marry ten times, but her
individuality is not absorbed by that of her various husbands.
She is a solar planet with a name and legal personality of her
own." 32
11.
DIVORCE
The three religions have
remarkable differences in their attitudes towards divorce.
Christianity abhors divorce altogether. The New Testament
unequivocally advocates the indissolubility of marriage. It is
attributed to Jesus to have said, "But I tell you that anyone
who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes
her to become adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced
woman commits adultery" (Matthew 5:32). This uncompromising
ideal is, without a doubt, unrealistic. It assumes a state of
moral perfection that human societies have never achieved. When
a couple realizes that their married life is beyond repair, a
ban on divorce will not do them any good. Forcing ill-mated
couples to remain together against their wills is neither
effective nor reasonable. No wonder the whole Christian world
has been obliged to sanction divorce.
Judaism, on the other
hand, allows divorce even without any cause. The Old Testament
gives the husband the right to divorce his wife even if he just
dislikes her:
"If a man marries a
woman who becomes displeasing to him because he finds something
indecent about her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce,
gives it to her and sends her from his house, and if after she
leaves his house she becomes the wife of another man, and her
second husband dislikes her and writes her a certificate of
divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, or if he
dies, then her first husband, who divorced her, is not allowed
to marry her again after she has been defiled" (Deut. 24:1-4).
The above verses have
caused some considerable debate among Jewish scholars because of
their disagreement over the interpretation of the words
"displeasing", "indecency", and "dislikes" mentioned in the
verses. The Talmud records their different opinions:
"The school of Shammai
held that a man should not divorce his wife unless he has found
her guilty of some sexual misconduct, while the school of Hillel
say he may divorce her even if she has merely spoiled a dish for
him. Rabbi Akiba says he may divorce her even if he simply finds
another woman more beautiful than she" (Gittin 90a-b).
The New Testament follows
the Shammaites opinion while Jewish law has followed the opinion
of the Hillelites and R. Akiba. 33 Since the Hillelites view
prevailed, it became the unbroken tradition of Jewish law to
give the husband freedom to divorce his wife without any cause
at all. The Old Testament not only gives the husband the right
to divorce his "displeasing" wife, it considers divorcing a "bad
wife" an obligation:
"A bad wife brings
humiliation, downcast looks, and a wounded heart. Slack of hand
and weak of knee is the man whose wife fails to make him happy.
Woman is the origin of sin, and it is through her that we all
die. Do not leave a leaky cistern to drip or allow a bad wife to
say what she likes. If she does not accept your control, divorce
her and send her away" (Ecclesiasticus 25:25).
The Talmud has recorded
several specific actions by wives which obliged their husbands
to divorce them: "If she ate in the street, if she drank
greedily in the street, if she suckled in the street, in every
case Rabbi Meir says that she must leave her husband" (Git.
89a). The Talmud has also made it mandatory to divorce a barren
wife (who bore no children in a period of ten years): "Our
Rabbis taught: If a man took a wife and lived with her for ten
years and she bore no child, he shall divorce her" (Yeb. 64a).
Wives, on the other hand,
cannot initiate divorce under Jewish law. A Jewish wife,
however, could claim the right to a divorce before a Jewish
court provided that a strong reason exists. Very few grounds are
provided for the wife to make a claim for a divorce. These
grounds include: A husband with physical defects or skin
disease, a husband not fulfilling his conjugal responsibilities,
etc. The Court might support the wife's claim to a divorce
but it cannot dissolve the marriage. Only the husband can
dissolve the marriage by giving his wife a bill of divorce. The
Court could scourge, fine, imprison, and excommunicate him to
force him to deliver the necessary bill of divorce to his wife.
However, if the husband is stubborn enough, he can refuse to
grant his wife a divorce and keep her tied to him indefinitely.
Worse still, he can desert her without granting her a divorce
and leave her unmarried and undivorced. He can marry another
woman or even live with any single woman out of wedlock and have
children from her (these children are considered legitimate
under Jewish law). The deserted wife, on the other hand, cannot
marry any other man since she is still legally married and she
cannot live with any other man because she will be considered an
adulteress and her children from this union will be illegitimate
for ten generations. A woman in such a position is called an
agunah (chained woman). 34 In the United States today there are
approximately 1000 to 1500 Jewish women who are agunot (plural
for agunah), while in Israel their number might be as high as
16000. Husbands may extort thousands of dollars from their
trapped wives in exchange for a Jewish divorce. 35
Islam occupies the middle
ground between Christianity and Judaism with respect to divorce.
Marriage in Islam is a sanctified bond that should not be broken
except for compelling reasons. Couples are instructed to pursue
all possible remedies whenever their marriages are in danger.
Divorce is not to be resorted to except when there is no other
way out. In a nutshell, Islam recognizes divorce, yet it
discourages it by all means. Let us focus on the recognition
side first. Islam does recognize the right of both partners to
end their matrimonial relationship. Islam gives the husband the
right for Talaq (divorce). Moreover, Islam, unlike Judaism,
grants the wife the right to dissolve the marriage through what
is known as Khula'. 36 If the husband dissolves the marriage by
divorcing his wife, he cannot retrieve any of the marriage gifts
he has given her. The Quran explicitly prohibits the divorcing
husbands from taking back their marriage gifts no matter how
expensive or valuable these gifts might be:
"But if you decide to
take one wife in place of another, even if you had given the
latter a whole treasure for dower, take not the least bit of it
back; Would you take it by slander and a manifest wrong?"
(4:20).
In the case of the wife
choosing to end the marriage, she may return the marriage gifts
to her husband. Returning the marriage gifts in this case is a
fair compensation for the husband who is keen to keep his wife
while she chooses to leave him. The Quran has instructed Muslim
men not to take back any of the gifts they have given to their
wives except in the case of the wife choosing to dissolve the
marriage:
"It is not lawful for
you (Men) to take back any of your gifts except when both
parties fear that they would be unable to keep the limits
ordained by Allah. There is no blame on either of them if she
give something for her freedom. These are the limits ordained by
Allah so do not transgress them" (2:229).
Also, a woman came to the
Prophet Muhammad seeking the dissolution of her marriage, she
told the Prophet that she did not have any complaints against
her husband's character or manners. Her only problem was that
she honestly did not like him to the extent of not being able to
live with him any longer. The Prophet asked her: "Would you give
him his garden (the marriage gift he had given her) back?" she
said: "Yes". The Prophet then instructed the man to take back
his garden and accept the dissolution of the marriage (Bukhari).
In some cases, A Muslim
wife might be willing to keep her marriage but find herself
obliged to claim for a divorce because of some compelling
reasons such as: Cruelty of the husband, desertion without a
reason, a husband not fulfilling his conjugal responsibilities,
etc. In these cases the Muslim court dissolves the marriage.
37
In short, Islam has
offered the Muslim woman some unequalled rights: she can end the
marriage through Khula' and she can sue for a divorce. A Muslim
wife can never become chained by a recalcitrant husband. It was
these rights that enticed Jewish women who lived in the early
Islamic societies of the seventh century C.E. to seek to obtain
bills of divorce from their Jewish husbands in Muslim courts.
The Rabbis declared these bills null and void. In order to end
this practice, the Rabbis gave new rights and privileges to
Jewish women in an attempt to weaken the appeal of the Muslim
courts. Jewish women living in Christian countries were not
offered any similar privileges since the Roman law of divorce
practiced there was no more attractive than the Jewish law. 38
Let us now focus our
attention on how Islam discourages divorce. The Prophet of Islam
told the believers that:
"among all the
permitted acts, divorce is the most hateful to God" (Abu Dawood).
A Muslim man should not
divorce his wife just because he dislikes her. The Quran
instructs Muslim men to be kind to their wives even in cases of
lukewarm emotions or feelings of dislike:
"Live with them (your
wives) on a footing of kindness and equity. If you dislike them
it may be that you dislike something in which Allah has placed a
great deal of good" (4:19).
Prophet Muhammad gave a
similar instruction:
" A believing man must
not hate a believing woman. If he dislikes one of her traits he
will be pleased with another" (Muslim).
The Prophet has also
emphasized that the best Muslims are those who are best to their
wives:
"The believers who show
the most perfect faith are those who have the best character and
the best of you are those who are best to their wives" (Tirmidthi).
However, Islam is a
practical religion and it does recognize that there are
circumstances in which a marriage becomes on the verge of
collapsing. In such cases, a mere advice of kindness or self
restraint is no viable solution. So, what to do in order to save
a marriage in these cases? The Quran offers some practical
advice for the spouse (husband or wife) whose partner (wife or
husband) is the wrongdoer. For the husband whose wife's
ill-conduct is threatening the marriage, the Quran gives four
types of advice as detailed in the following verses:
"As to those women on
whose part you fear disloyalty and ill-conduct, (1) Admonish
them, (2) refuse to share their beds, (3) beat them; but if they
return to obedience seek not against them means of annoyance:
For Allah is Most High, Great. (4) If you fear a break between
them, appoint two arbiters, one from his family and the other
from hers; If they wish for peace, Allah will cause their
reconciliation" (4:34-35).
The first three are to be
tried first. If they fail, then the help of the families
concerned should be sought. It has to be noted, in the light of
the above verses, that beating the rebellious wife is a
temporary measure that is resorted to as third in line in cases
of extreme necessity in hopes that it might remedy the
wrongdoing of the wife. If it does, the husband is not allowed
by any means to continue any annoyance to the wife as explicitly
mentioned in the verse. If it does not, the husband is still not
allowed to use this measure any longer and the final avenue of
the family-assisted reconciliation has to be explored.
Prophet Muhammad has
instructed Muslim husbands that they should not have recourse to
these measures except in extreme cases such as open lewdness
committed by the wife. Even in these cases the punishment should
be slight and if the wife desists, the husband is not permitted
to irritate her:
"In case they are
guilty of open lewdness you may leave them alone in their beds
and inflict slight punishment. If they are obedient to you, do
not seek against them any means of annoyance" (Tirmidthi)
Furthermore, the Prophet
of Islam has condemned any unjustifiable beating. Some Muslim
wives complained to him that their husbands had beaten them.
Hearing that, the Prophet categorically stated that:
"Those who do so (beat
their wives) are not the best among you" (Abu Dawood).
It has to be remembered at
this point that the Prophet has also said:
"The best of you is he
who is best to his family, and I am the best among you to my
family" (Tirmidthi).
The Prophet advised one
Muslim woman, whose name was Fatimah bint Qais, not to marry a
man because the man was known for beating women:
"I went to the Prophet
and said: Abul Jahm and Mu'awiah have proposed to marry me. The
Prophet (by way of advice) said: As to Mu'awiah he is very poor
and Abul Jahm is accustomed to beating women" (Muslim).
It has to be noted that
the Talmud sanctions wife beating as chastisement for the
purpose of discipline. 39 The husband is not restricted to the
extreme cases such as those of open lewdness. He is allowed to
beat his wife even if she just refuses to do her house work.
Moreover, he is not limited only to the use of light punishment.
He is permitted to break his wife's stubbornness by the lash or
by starving her. 40
For the wife whose
husband's ill-conduct is the cause for the marriage's near
collapse, the Quran offers the following advice:
"If a wife fears
cruelty or desertion on her husband's part, there is no blame on
them if they arrange an amicable settlement between themselves;
and such settlement is best" (4:128).
In this case, the wife is
advised to seek reconciliation with her husband (with or without
family assistance). It is notable that the Quran is not advising
the wife to resort to the two measures of abstention from sex
and beating. The reason for this disparity might be to protect
the wife from a violent physical reaction by her already
misbehaving husband. Such a violent physical reaction will do
both the wife and the marriage more harm than good. Some Muslim
scholars have suggested that the court can apply these measures
against the husband on the wife's behalf. That is, the court
first admonishes the rebellious husband, then forbids him his
wife's bed, and finally executes a symbolic beating. 41
To sum up, Islam offers
Muslim married couples much viable advice to save their
marriages in cases of trouble and tension. If one of the
partners is jeopardizing the matrimonial relationship, the other
partner is advised by the Quran to do whatever possible and
effective in order to save this sacred bond. If all the measures
fail, Islam allows the partners to separate peacefully and
amicably.
12.
MOTHERS
The Old Testament in
several places commands kind and considerate treatment of the
parents and condemns those who dishonor them. For example, "If
anyone curses his father or mother, he must be put to death"
(Lev. 20:9) and "A wise man brings joy to his father but a
foolish man despises his mother" (Proverbs 15:20). Although
honoring the father alone is mentioned in some places, e.g. "A
wise man heeds his father's instruction" (Proverbs 13:1), the
mother alone is never mentioned. Moreover, there is no special
emphasis on treating the mother kindly as a sign of appreciation
of her great suffering in childbearing and suckling. Besides,
mothers do not inherit at all from their children while fathers
do. 42
It is difficult to speak
of the New Testament as a scripture that calls for honoring the
mother. To the contrary, one gets the impression that the New
Testament considers kind treatment of mothers as an impediment
on the way to God. According to the New Testament, one cannot
become a good Christian worthy of becoming a disciple of Christ
unless he hates his mother. It is attributed to Jesus to have
said:
"If anyone comes to me
and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children,
his brothers and sisters--yes, even his own life--he can not be
my disciple" (Luke 14:26).
Furthermore, the New
Testament depicts a picture of Jesus as indifferent to, or even
disrespectful of, his own mother. For example, when she had come
looking for him while he was preaching to a crowd, he did not
care to go out to see her:
"Then Jesus' mother and
brothers arrived. Standing outside, they sent someone to call
him. A crowd was sitting around him and they told him, 'Your
mother and brothers are outside looking for you.' 'Who are my
mother and my brothers?' he asked. Then he looked at those
seated in a circle around him and said,' Here are my mother and
my brothers! Whoever does God's will is my brother and sister
and mother.' " (Mark 3:31-35)
One might argue that Jesus
was trying to teach his audience an important lesson that
religious ties are no less important than family ties. However,
he could have taught his listeners the same lesson without
showing such absolute indifference to his mother. The same
disrespectful attitude is depicted when he refused to endorse a
statement made by a member of his audience blessing his mother's
role in giving birth to him and nursing him:
"As Jesus was saying
these things, a woman in the crowd called out, 'Blessed is the
mother who gave you birth and nursed you.' He replied, 'Blessed
rather are those who hear the word of God and obey it.' " (Luke
11:27-28)
If a mother with the
stature of the virgin Mary had been treated with such
discourtesy, as depicted in the New Testament, by a son of the
stature of Jesus Christ, then how should an average Christian
mother be treated by her average Christian sons?
In Islam, the honor,
respect, and esteem attached to motherhood is unparalleled. The
Quran places the importance of kindness to parents as second
only to worshipping God Almighty:
"Your Lord has decreed
that you worship none but Him, And that you be kind to parents.
Whether one or both of them attain old age in your life, Say not
to them a word of contempt, nor repel them, But address them in
terms of honor. And out of kindness, Lower to them the wing of
humility, and say: 'My Lord! bestow on them Your Mercy as they
Cherished me in childhood' " (17:23-24).
The Quran in several other
places puts special emphasis on the mother's great role in
giving birth and nursing:
"And We have enjoined
on man to be good to his parents: In travail upon travail did
his mother bear him and in two years was his weaning. Show
gratitude to Me and to your parents" (31:14).
The very special place of
mothers in Islam has been eloquently described by Prophet
Muhammad:
"A man asked the
Prophet: 'Whom should I honor most?' The Prophet replied: 'Your
mother'. 'And who comes next?' asked the man. The Prophet
replied: 'Your mother'. 'And who comes next?' asked the man. The
Prophet replied: 'Your mother!'. 'And who comes next?' asked the
man. The Prophet replied: 'Your father'" (Bukhari and Muslim).
Among the few precepts of
Islam which Muslims still faithfully observe to the present day
is the considerate treatment of mothers. The honor that Muslim
mothers receive from their sons and daughters is exemplary. The
intensely warm relations between Muslim mothers and their
children and the deep respect with which Muslim men approach
their mothers usually amaze Westerners. 43
13.
FEMALE
INHERITANCE ?
One of the most important
differences between the Quran and the Bible is their attitude
towards female inheritance of the property of a deceased
relative. The Biblical attitude has been succinctly described by
Rabbi Epstein: "The continuous and unbroken tradition since the
Biblical days gives the female members of the household, wife
and daughters, no right of succession to the family estate. In
the more primitive scheme of succession, the female members of
the family were considered part of the estate and as remote from
the legal personality of an heir as the slave. Whereas by Mosaic
enactment the daughters were admitted to succession in the event
of no male issue remained, the wife was not recognized as heir
even in such conditions." 44 Why were the female members of the
family considered part of the family estate? Rabbi Epstein has
the answer: "They are owned --before marriage, by the father;
after marriage, by the husband." 45
The Biblical rules of
inheritance are outlined in Numbers 27:1-11. A wife is given no
share in her husband's estate, while he is her first heir, even
before her sons. A daughter can inherit only if no male heirs
exist. A mother is not an heir at all while the father is.
Widows and daughters, in case male children remained, were at
the mercy of the male heirs for provision. That is why widows
and orphan girls were among the most destitute members of the
Jewish society.
Christianity has followed
suit for long time. Both the ecclesiastical and civil laws of
Christendom barred daughters from sharing with their brothers in
the father's patrimony. Besides, wives were deprived of any
inheritance rights. These iniquitous laws survived till late in
the last century46.
Among the pagan Arabs
before Islam, inheritance rights were confined exclusively to
the male relatives. The Quran abolished all these unjust customs
and gave all the female relatives inheritance shares:
"From what is left by
parents and those nearest related there is a share for men and a
share for women, whether the property be small or large --a
determinate share" (4:7).
Muslim mothers, wives,
daughters, and sisters had received inheritance rights thirteen
hundred years before Europe recognized that these rights even
existed. The division of inheritance is a vast subject with an
enormous amount of details (4:7,11,12,176). The general rule is
that the female share is half the male's except the cases in
which the mother receives equal share to that of the father.
This general rule if taken in isolation from other legislations
concerning men and women may seem unfair. In order to understand
the rationale behind this rule, one must take into account the
fact that the financial obligations of men in Islam far exceed
those of women (see the "Wife's property?" section). A
bridegroom must provide his bride with a marriage gift. This
gift becomes her exclusive property and remains so even if she
is later divorced. The bride is under no obligation to present
any gifts to her groom. Moreover, the Muslim husband is charged
with the maintenance of his wife and children. The wife, on the
other hand, is not obliged to help him in this regard. Her
property and earnings are for her use alone except what she may
voluntarily offer her husband. Besides, one has to realize that
Islam vehemently advocates family life. It strongly encourages
youth to get married, discourages divorce, and does not regard
celibacy as a virtue. Therefore, in a truly Islamic society,
family life is the norm and single life is the rare exception.
That is, almost all marriage-aged women and men are married in
an Islamic society. In light of these facts, one would
appreciate that Muslim men, in general, have greater financial
burdens than Muslim women and thus inheritance rules are meant
to offset this imbalance so that the society lives free of all
gender or class wars. After a simple comparison between the
financial rights and duties of Muslim women, one British Muslim
woman has concluded that Islam has treated women not only fairly
but generously. 47
14.
PLIGHT OF
WIDOWS
Because of the fact that
the Old Testament recognized no inheritance rights to them,
widows were among the most vulnerable of the Jewish population.
The male relatives who inherited all of a woman's deceased
husband's estate were to provide for her from that estate.
However, widows had no way to ensure this provision was carried
out, and lived on the mercy of others. Therefore, widows were
among the lowest classes in ancient Israel and widowhood was
considered a symbol of great degradation (Isaiah 54:4). But the
plight of a widow in the Biblical tradition extended even beyond
her exclusion from her husband's property. According to Genesis
38, a childless widow must marry her husband's brother, even if
he is already married, so that he can produce offspring for his
dead brother, thus ensuring his brother's name will not die out.
"Then Judah said to
Onan, 'Lie with your brother's wife and fulfill your duty to her
as a brother-in-law to produce offspring for your brother' "
(Genesis 38:8).
The widow's consent to
this marriage is not required. The widow is treated as part of
her deceased husband's property whose main function is to ensure
her husband's posterity. This Biblical law is still practiced in
today's Israel. 48 A childless widow in Israel is bequeathed to
her husband's brother. If the brother is too young to marry, she
has to wait until he comes of age. Should the deceased husband's
brother refuse to marry her, she is set free and can then marry
any man of her choice. It is not an uncommon phenomenon in
Israel that widows are subjected to blackmail by their
brothers-in-law in order to gain their freedom.
The pagan Arabs before
Islam had similar practices. A widow was considered a part of
her husband's property to be inherited by his male heirs and she
was, usually, given in marriage to the deceased man's eldest son
from another wife. The Quran scathingly attacked and abolished
this degrading custom:
"And marry not women
whom your fathers married--Except what is past-- it was
shameful, odious, and abominable custom indeed" (4:22).
Widows and divorced women
were so looked down upon in the Biblical tradition that the high
priest could not marry a widow, a divorced woman, or a
prostitute:
"The woman he (the high
priest) marries must be a virgin. He must not marry a widow, a
divorced woman, or a woman defiled by prostitution, but only a
virgin from his own people, so he will not defile his offspring
among his people" (Lev. 21:13-15)
In Israel today, a
descendant of the Cohen caste (the high priests of the days of
the Temple) cannot marry a divorcee, a widow, or a prostitute.
49 In the Jewish legislation, a woman who has been widowed three
times with all the three husbands dying of natural causes is
considered 'fatal' and forbidden to marry again. 50 The Quran,
on the other hand, recognizes neither castes nor fatal persons.
Widows and divorcees have the freedom to marry whomever they
choose. There is no stigma attached to divorce or widowhood in
the Quran:
"When you divorce women
and they fulfil their terms [three menstruation periods] either
take them back on equitable terms or set them free on equitable
terms; But do not take them back to injure them or to take undue
advantage, If anyone does that, he wrongs his own soul. Do not
treat Allah's signs as a jest" (2:231).
"If any of you die and
leave widows behind, they shall wait four months and ten days.
When they have fulfilled their term, there is no blame on you if
they dispose of themselves in a just manner" (2:234).
"Those of you who die
and leave widows should bequeath for their widows a year's
maintenance and residence. But if they [the widows] leave (the
residence) there is no blame on you for what they justly do with
themselves" (2:240).
15.
POLYGAMY
Let us now tackle the
important question of polygamy. Polygamy is a very ancient
practice found in many human societies. The Bible did not
condemn polygamy. To the contrary, the Old Testament and
Rabbinic writings frequently attest to the legality of polygamy.
King Solomon is said to have had 700 wives and 300 concubines (1
Kings 11:3) Also, king David is said to have had many wives and
concubines (2 Samuel 5:13). The Old Testament does have some
injunctions on how to distribute the property of a man among his
sons from different wives (Deut. 22:7). The only restriction on
polygamy is a ban on taking a wife's sister as a rival wife
(Lev. 18:18). The Talmud advises a maximum of four wives. 51
European Jews continued to practice polygamy until the sixteenth
century. Oriental Jews regularly practiced polygamy until they
arrived in Israel where it is forbidden under civil law.
However, under religious law which overrides civil law in such
cases, it is permissible. 52
What about the New
Testament? According to Father Eugene Hillman in his insightful
book, Polygamy reconsidered, "Nowhere in the New Testament is
there any explicit commandment that marriage should be
monogamous or any explicit commandment forbidding polygamy." 53
Moreover, Jesus has not spoken against polygamy though it was
practiced by the Jews of his society. Father Hillman stresses
the fact that the Church in Rome banned polygamy in order to
conform to the Greco-Roman culture (which prescribed only one
legal wife while tolerating concubinage and prostitution). He
cited St. Augustine, "Now indeed in our time, and in keeping
with Roman custom, it is no longer allowed to take another
wife." 54 African churches and African Christians often remind
their European brothers that the Church's ban on polygamy is a
cultural tradition and not an authentic Christian injunction.
The Quran, too, allowed
polygamy, but not without restrictions:
"If you fear that you
shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans, marry women
of your choice, two or three or four; but if you fear that you
shall not be able to deal justly with them, then only one"
(4:3).
The Quran, contrary to the
Bible, limited the maximum number of wives to four under the
strict condition of treating the wives equally and justly. It
should not be understood that the Quran is exhorting the
believers to practice polygamy, or that polygamy is considered
as an ideal. In other words, the Quran has "tolerated" or
"allowed" polygamy, and no more, but why? Why is polygamy
permissible ? The answer is simple: there are places and times
in which there are compelling social and moral reasons for
polygamy. As the above Quranic verse indicates, the issue of
polygamy in Islam cannot be understood apart from community
obligations towards orphans and widows. Islam as a universal
religion suitable for all places and all times could not ignore
these compelling obligations.
In most human societies,
females outnumber males. In the U.S. there are, at least, eight
million more women than men. In a country like Guinea there are
122 females for every 100 males. In Tanzania, there are 95.1
males per 100 females. 55 What should a society do towards such
unbalanced sex ratios? There are various solutions, some might
suggest celibacy, others would prefer female infanticide (which
does happen in some societies in the world today !). Others may
think the only outlet is that the society should tolerate all
manners of sexual permissiveness: prostitution, sex out of
wedlock, homosexuality, etc. For other societies , like
most African societies today, the most honorable outlet is to
allow polygamous marriage as a culturally accepted and socially
respected institution. The point that is often misunderstood in
the West is that women in other cultures do not necessarily look
at polygamy as a sign of women's degradation. For example, many
young African brides , whether Christians or Muslims or
otherwise, would prefer to marry a married man who has already
proved himself to be a responsible husband. Many African wives
urge their husbands to get a second wife so that they do not
feel lonely. 56 A survey of over six thousand women, ranging in
age from 15 to 59, conducted in the second largest city in
Nigeria showed that 60 percent of these women would be pleased
if their husbands took another wife. Only 23 percent expressed
anger at the idea of sharing with another wife. Seventy-six
percent of the women in a survey conducted in Kenya viewed
polygamy positively. In a survey undertaken in rural Kenya, 25
out of 27 women considered polygamy to be better than monogamy.
These women felt polygamy can be a happy and beneficial
experience if the co-wives cooperate with each other. 57
Polygamy in most African societies is such a respectable
institution that some Protestant churches are becoming more
tolerant of it. A bishop of the Anglican Church in Kenya
declared that, "Although monogamy may be ideal for the
expression of love between husband and wife, the church should
consider that in certain cultures polygyny is socially
acceptable and that the belief that polygyny is contrary to
Christianity is no longer tenable." 58 After a careful study of
African polygamy, Reverend David Gitari of the Anglican Church
has concluded that polygamy, as ideally practiced, is more
Christian than divorce and remarriage as far as the abandoned
wives and children are concerned. 59 I personally know of some
highly educated African wives who, despite having lived in the
West for many years, do not have any objections against
polygamy. One of them, who lives in the U.S., solemnly exhorts
her husband to get a second wife to help her in raising the
kids.
The problem of the
unbalanced sex ratios becomes truly problematic at times of war.
Native American Indian tribes used to suffer highly unbalanced
sex ratios after wartime losses. Women in these tribes, who in
fact enjoyed a fairly high status, accepted polygamy as the best
protection against indulgence in indecent activities. European
settlers, without offering any other alternative, condemned this
Indian polygamy as 'uncivilised'. 60 After the second world war,
there were 7,300,000 more women than men in Germany (3.3 million
of them were widows). There were 100 men aged 20 to 30 for every
167 women in that age group. 61 Many of these women needed a man
not only as a companion but also as a provider for the household
in a time of unprecedented misery and hardship. The soldiers of
the victorious Allied Armies exploited these women's
vulnerability. Many young girls and widows had liaisons with
members of the occupying forces. Many American and British
soldiers paid for their pleasures in cigarettes, chocolate, and
bread. Children were overjoyed at the gifts these strangers
brought. A 10 year old boy on hearing of such gifts from other
children wished from all his heart for an 'Englishman' for his
mother so that she need not go hungry any longer. 62 We have to
ask our own conscience at this point: What is more dignifying to
a woman? An accepted and respected second wife as in the native
Indians' approach, or a virtual prostitute as in the 'civilised'
Allies approach? In other words, what is more dignifying to a
woman, the Quranic prescription or the theology based on the
culture of the Roman Empire?
It is interesting to note
that in an international youth conference held in Munich in 1948
the problem of the highly unbalanced sex ratio in Germany was
discussed. When it became clear that no solution could be agreed
upon, some participants suggested polygamy. The initial reaction
of the gathering was a mixture of shock and disgust. However,
after a careful study of the proposal, the participants agreed
that it was the only possible solution. Consequently, polygamy
was included among the conference final recommendations. 63
The world today possesses
more weapons of mass destruction than ever before and the
European churches might, sooner or later, be obliged to accept
polygamy as the only way out. Father Hillman has thoughtfully
recognized this fact, "It is quite conceivable that these
genocidal techniques (nuclear, biological, chemical..) could
produce so drastic an imbalance among the sexes that plural
marriage would become a necessary means of survival....Then
contrary to previous custom and law, an overriding natural and
moral inclination might arise in favour of polygamy. In such a
situation, theologians and church leaders would quickly produce
weighty reasons and biblical texts to justify a new conception
of marriage." 64
To the present day,
polygamy continues to be a viable solution to some of the social
ills of modern societies. The communal obligations that the
Quran mentions in association with the permission of polygamy
are more visible at present in some Western societies than in
Africa. For example, In the United States today, there is a
severe gender crisis in the black community. One out of every
twenty young black males may die before reaching the age of 21.
For those between 20 and 35 years of age, homicide is the
leading cause of death. 65 Besides, many young black males are
unemployed, in jail, or on dope. 66 As a result, one in four
black women, at age 40, has never married, as compared with one
in ten white women. 67 Moreover, many young black females become
single mothers before the age of 20 and find themselves in need
of providers. The end result of these tragic circumstances is
that an increasing number of black women are engaged in what is
called 'man-sharing'. 68 That is, many of these hapless single
black women are involved in affairs with married men. The wives
are often unaware of the fact that other women are 'sharing'
their husbands with them. Some observers of the crisis of
man-sharing in the African American community strongly recommend
consensual polygamy as a temporary answer to the shortage of
black males until more comprehensive reforms in the American
society at large are undertaken. 69 By consensual polygamy they
mean a polygamy that is sanctioned by the community and to which
all the parties involved have agreed, as opposed to the usually
secret man-sharing which is detrimental both to the wife and to
the community in general. The problem of man-sharing in the
African American community was the topic of a panel discussion
held at Temple University in Philadelphia on January 27, 1993.
70 Some of the speakers recommended polygamy as one potential
remedy for the crisis. They also suggested that polygamy should
not be banned by law, particularly in a society that tolerates
prostitution and mistresses. The comment of one woman from the
audience that African Americans needed to learn from Africa
where polygamy was responsibly practiced elicited enthusiastic
applause.
Philip Kilbride, an
American anthropologist of Roman Catholic heritage, in his
provocative book, Plural marriage for our time, proposes
polygamy as a solution to some of the ills of the American
society at large. He argues that plural marriage may serve as a
potential alternative for divorce in many cases in order to
obviate the damaging impact of divorce on many children. He
maintains that many divorces are caused by the rampant
extramarital affairs in the American society. According to
Kilbride, ending an extramarital affair in a polygamous
marriage, rather than in a divorce, is better for the children,
"Children would be better served if family augmentation rather
than only separation and dissolution were seen as options."
Moreover, he suggests that other groups will also benefit from
plural marriage such as: elderly women who face a chronic
shortage of men and the African Americans who are involved in
man-sharing. 71
In 1987, a poll conducted
by the student newspaper at the university of California at
Berkeley asked the students whether they agreed that men should
be allowed by law to have more than one wife in response to a
perceived shortage of male marriage candidates in California.
Almost all of the students polled approved of the idea. One
female student even stated that a polyganous marriage would
fulfil her emotional and physical needs while giving her greater
freedom than a monogamous union. 72 In fact, this same argument
is also used by the few remaining fundamentalist Mormon women
who still practice polygamy in the U.S. They believe that
polygamy is an ideal way for a woman to have both a career and
children since the wives help each other care for the children.
73
It has to be added that
polygamy in Islam is a matter of mutual consent. No one can
force a woman to marry a married man. Besides, the wife has the
right to stipulate that her husband must not marry any other
woman as a second wife. 74 The Bible, on the other hand,
sometimes resorts to forcible polygamy. A childless widow must
marry her husband's brother, even if he is already married (see
the "Plight of Widows" section),regardless of her consent
(Genesis 38:8-10).
It should be noted that in
many Muslim societies today the practice of polygamy is rare
since the gap between the numbers of both sexes is not huge. One
can, safely, say that the rate of polygamous marriages in the
Muslim world is much less than the rate of extramarital affairs
in the West. In other words, men in the Muslim world today are
far more strictly monogamous than men in the Western world.
Billy Graham, the eminent
Christian evangelist has recognized this fact: "Christianity
cannot compromise on the question of polygamy. If present-day
Christianity cannot do so, it is to its own detriment. Islam has
permitted polygamy as a solution to social ills and has allowed
a certain degree of latitude to human nature but only within the
strictly defined framework of the law. Christian countries make
a great show of monogamy, but actually they practice polygamy.
No one is unaware of the part mistresses play in Western
society. In this respect Islam is a fundamentally honest
religion, and permits a Muslim to marry a second wife if he
must, but strictly forbids all clandestine amatory associations
in order to safeguard the moral probity of the community." 75
It is of interest to note
that many, non-Muslim as well as Muslim, countries in the world
today have outlawed polygamy. Taking a second wife, even with
the free consent of the first wife, is a violation of the law.
On the other hand, cheating on the wife, without her knowledge
or consent, is perfectly legitimate as far as the law is
concerned! What is the legal wisdom behind such a contradiction?
Is the law designed to reward deception and punish honesty? It
is one of the unfathomable paradoxes of our modern 'civilised'
world.
16.
THE VEIL
Finally, let us shed some
light on what is considered in the West as the greatest symbol
of women's oppression and servitude, the veil or the head cover.
Is it true that there is no such thing as the veil in the
Judaeo-Christian tradition? Let us set the record straight.
According to Rabbi Dr. Menachem M. Brayer (Professor of Biblical
Literature at Yeshiva University) in his book, The Jewish woman
in Rabbinic literature, it was the custom of Jewish women to go
out in public with a head covering which, sometimes, even
covered the whole face leaving one eye free. 76 He quotes some
famous ancient Rabbis saying," It is not like the daughters of
Israel to walk out with heads uncovered" and "Cursed be the man
who lets the hair of his wife be seen....a woman who exposes her
hair for self-adornment brings poverty." Rabbinic law forbids
the recitation of blessings or prayers in the presence of a
bareheaded married woman since uncovering the woman's hair is
considered "nudity".77 Dr. Brayer also mentions that "During the
Tannaitic period the Jewish woman's failure to cover her head
was considered an affront to her modesty. When her head was
uncovered she might be fined four hundred zuzim for this
offense." Dr. Brayer also explains that veil of the Jewish woman
was not always considered a sign of modesty. Sometimes, the veil
symbolized a state of distinction and luxury rather than
modesty. The veil personified the dignity and superiority of
noble women. It also represented a woman's inaccessibility as a
sanctified possession of her husband. 78
The veil signified a
woman's self-respect and social status. Women of lower classes
would often wear the veil to give the impression of a higher
standing. The fact that the veil was the sign of nobility was
the reason why prostitutes were not permitted to cover their
hair in the old Jewish society. However, prostitutes often wore
a special headscarf in order to look respectable. 79 Jewish
women in Europe continued to wear veils until the nineteenth
century when their lives became more intermingled with the
surrounding secular culture. The external pressures of the
European life in the nineteenth century forced many of them to
go out bare-headed. Some Jewish women found it more convenient
to replace their traditional veil with a wig as another form of
hair covering. Today, most pious Jewish women do not cover their
hair except in the synagogue. 80 Some of them, such as the
Hasidic sects, still use the wig. 81
What about the Christian
tradition? It is well known that Catholic Nuns have been
covering their heads for hundreds of years, but that is not all.
St. Paul in the New Testament made some very interesting
statements about the veil:
"Now I want you to
realize that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of
the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God. Every man who
prays or prophesies with his head covered dishonours his head.
And every woman who prays or prophesies with her head uncovered
dishonours her head - it is just as though her head were shaved.
If a woman does not cover her head, she should have her hair cut
off; and if it is a disgrace for a woman to have her hair cut
off or shaved off, she should cover her head. A man ought not to
cover his head, since he is the image and glory of God; but the
woman is the glory of man. For man did not come from woman, but
woman from man; neither was man created for woman, but woman for
man. For this reason, and because of the angels, the woman ought
to have a sign of authority on her head" (I Corinthians
11:3-10).
St. Paul's rationale for
veiling women is that the veil represents a sign of the
authority of the man, who is the image and glory of God, over
the woman who was created from and for man. St. Tertullian in
his famous treatise 'On The Veiling Of Virgins' wrote, "Young
women, you wear your veils out on the streets, so you should
wear them in the church, you wear them when you are among
strangers, then wear them among your brothers..." Among the
Canon laws of the Catholic church today, there is a law that
requires women to cover their heads in church. 82 Some Christian
denominations, such as the Amish and the Mennonites for example,
keep their women veiled to the present day. The reason for the
veil, as offered by their Church leaders, is that "The head
covering is a symbol of woman's subjection to the man and to
God", which is the same logic introduced by St. Paul in the New
Testament. 83
From all the above
evidence, it is obvious that Islam did not invent the head
cover. However, Islam did endorse it. The Quran urges the
believing men and women to lower their gaze and guard their
modesty and then urges the believing women to extend their head
covers to cover the neck and the bosom:
"Say to the believing
men that they should lower their gaze and guard their
modesty......And say to the believing women that they should
lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that they should not
display their beauty and ornaments except what ordinarily appear
thereof; that they should draw their veils over their
bosoms...." (24:30,31).
The Quran is quite clear
that the veil is essential for modesty, but why is modesty
important? The Quran is still clear:
"O Prophet, tell your
wives and daughters and the believing women that they should
cast their outer garments over their bodies (when abroad) so
that they should be known and not molested" (33:59).
This is the whole point,
modesty is prescribed to protect women from molestation or
simply, modesty is protection. Thus, the only purpose of the
veil in Islam is protection. The Islamic veil, unlike the veil
of the Christian tradition, is not a sign of man's authority
over woman nor is it a sign of woman's subjection to man. The
Islamic veil, unlike the veil in the Jewish tradition, is not a
sign of luxury and distinction of some noble married women. The
Islamic veil is only a sign of modesty with the purpose of
protecting women, all women. The Islamic philosophy is that it
is always better to be safe than sorry. In fact, the Quran is so
concerned with protecting women's bodies and women's reputation
that a man who dares to falsely accuse a woman of unchastity
will be severely punished:
"And those who launch a
charge against chaste women, and produce not four witnesses (to
support their allegations)- Flog them with eighty stripes; and
reject their evidence ever after: for such men are wicked
transgressors" (24:4)
Compare this strict
Quranic attitude with the extremely lax punishment for rape in
the Bible:
" If a man happens to
meet a virgin who is not pledged to be married and rapes her and
they are discovered, he shall pay the girl's father fifty
shekels of silver. He must marry the girl, for he has violated
her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives" (Deut.
22:28-30)
One must ask a simple
question here, who is really punished? The man who only paid a
fine for rape, or the girl who is forced to marry the man who
raped her and live with him until he dies? Another question that
also should be asked is this: which is more protective of women,
the Quranic strict attitude or the Biblical lax attitude?
Some people, especially in
the West, would tend to ridicule the whole argument of modesty
for protection. Their argument is that the best protection is
the spread of education, civilised behaviour, and self
restraint. We would say: fine but not enough. If 'civilization'
is enough protection, then why is it that women in North America
dare not walk alone in a dark street - or even across an empty
parking lot ? If Education is the solution, then why is it that
a respected university like Queen's has a 'walk home service'
mainly for female students on campus? If self restraint is the
answer, then why are cases of sexual harassment in the workplace
reported on the news media every day? A sample of those accused
of sexual harassment, in the last few years, includes: Navy
officers, Managers, University professors, Senators, Supreme
Court Justices, and the President of the United States! I could
not believe my eyes when I read the following statistics,
written in a pamphlet issued by the Dean of Women's office at
Queen's University:
-
In Canada, a woman is
sexually assaulted every 6 minutes,
-
1 in 3 women in Canada
will be sexually assaulted at some time in their lives,
-
1 in 4 women are at the
risk of rape or attempted rape in her lifetime,
-
1 in 8 women will be
sexually assaulted while attending college or university, and
-
A study found 60% of
Canadian university-aged males said they would commit sexual
assault if they were certain they wouldn't get caught.
Something is fundamentally
wrong in the society we live in. A radical change in the
society's life style and culture is absolutely necessary. A
culture of modesty is badly needed, modesty in dress, in speech,
and in manners of both men and women. Otherwise, the grim
statistics will grow even worse day after day and,
unfortunately, women alone will be paying the price. Actually,
we all suffer but as K. Gibran has said, "...for the person who
receives the blows is not like the one who counts them." [84]
Therefore, a society like France which expels young women from
schools because of their modest dress is, in the end, simply
harming itself.
It is one of the great
ironies of our world today that the very same headscarf revered
as a sign of 'holiness' when worn for the purpose of showing the
authority of man by Catholic Nuns, is reviled as a sign of
'oppression' when worn for the purpose of protection by Muslim
women.
17.
EPILOGUE
The one question all the
non-Muslims, who had read an earlier version of this study, had
in common was: do Muslim women in the Muslim world today receive
this noble treatment described here? The answer, unfortunately,
is: No. Since this question is inevitable in any discussion
concerning the status of women in Islam, we have to elaborate on
the answer in order to provide the reader with the complete
picture.
It has to be made clear
first that the vast differences among Muslim societies make most
generalizations too simplistic. There is a wide spectrum of
attitudes towards women in the Muslim world today. These
attitudes differ from one society to another and within each
individual society. Nevertheless, certain general trends are
discernible. Almost all Muslim societies have, to one degree or
another, deviated from the ideals of Islam with respect to the
status of women. These deviations have, for the most part, been
in one of two opposite directions. The first direction is more
conservative, restrictive, and traditions-oriented, while the
second is more liberal and Western-oriented.
The societies that have
digressed in the first direction treat women according to the
customs and traditions inherited from their forebears. These
traditions usually deprive women of many rights granted to them
by Islam. Besides, women are treated according to standards far
different from those applied to men. This discrimination
pervades the life of any female: she is received with less joy
at birth than a boy; she is less likely to go to school; she
might be deprived any share of her family's inheritance; she is
under continuous surveillance in order not to behave immodestly
while her brother's immodest acts are tolerated; she might even
be killed for committing what her male family members usually
boast of doing; she has very little say in family affairs or
community interests; she might not have full control over her
property and her marriage gifts; and finally as a mother she
herself would prefer to produce boys so that she can attain a
higher status in her community.
On the other hand, there
are Muslim societies (or certain classes within some societies)
that have been swept over by the Western culture and way of
life. These societies often imitate unthinkingly whatever they
receive from the West and usually end up adopting the worst
fruits of Western civilization. In these societies, a typical
"modern" woman's top priority in life is to enhance her physical
beauty. Therefore, she is often obsessed with her body's shape,
size, and weight. She tends to care more about her body than her
mind and more about her charms than her intellect. Her ability
to charm, attract, and excite is more valued in the society than
her educational achievements, intellectual pursuits, and social
work. One is not expected to find a copy of the Quran in her
purse since it is full of cosmetics that accompany her wherever
she goes. Her spirituality has no room in a society preoccupied
with her attractiveness. Therefore, she would spend her life
striving more to realize her femininity than to fulfil her
humanity.
Why did Muslim societies
deviate from the ideals of Islam? There is no easy answer. A
penetrating explanation of the reasons why Muslims have not
adhered to the Quranic guidance with respect to women would be
beyond the scope of this study. It has to be made clear,
however, that Muslim societies have deviated from the Islamic
precepts concerning so many aspects of their lives for so long.
There is a wide gap between what Muslims are supposed to believe
in and what they actually practice. This gap is not a recent
phenomenon. It has been there for centuries and has been
widening day after day. This ever widening gap has had
disastrous consequences on the Muslim world manifested in almost
all aspects of life: political tyranny and fragmentation,
economic backwardness, social injustice, scientific bankruptcy,
intellectual stagnation, etc. The non-Islamic status of
women in the Muslim world today is merely a symptom of a deeper
malady. Any reform in the current status of Muslim women is not
expected to be fruitful if not accompanied with more
comprehensive reforms of the Muslim societies' whole way of
life. The Muslim world is in need for a renaissance that will
bring it closer to the ideals of Islam and not further from
them. To sum up, the notion that the poor status of Muslim women
today is because of Islam is an utter misconception. The
problems of Muslims in general are not due to too much
attachment to Islam, they are the culmination of a long and deep
detachment from it.
It has, also, to be
re-emphasized that the purpose behind this comparative study is
not, by any means, to defame Judaism or Christianity. The
position of women in the Judaeo-Christian tradition might seem
frightening by our late twentieth century standards.
Nevertheless, it has to be viewed within the proper historical
context. In other words, any objective assessment of the
position of women in the Judaeo-Christian tradition has to take
into account the historical circumstances in which this
tradition developed. There can be no doubt that the views of the
Rabbis and the Church Fathers regarding women were influenced by
the prevalent attitudes towards women in their societies. The
Bible itself was written by different authors at different
times. These authors could not have been impervious to the
values and the way of life of the people around them. For
example, the adultery laws of the Old Testament are so biased
against women that they defy rational explanation by our
mentality. However, if we consider the fact that the early
Jewish tribes were obsessed with their genetic homogeneity and
extremely eager to define themselves apart from the surrounding
tribes and that only sexual misconduct by the married females of
the tribes could threaten these cherished aspirations, we should
then be able to understand, but not necessarily sympathize with,
the reasons for this bias. Also, the diatribes of the Church
Fathers against women should not be detached from the context of
the misogynist Greco-Roman culture in which they lived. It would
be unfair to evaluate the Judaeo-Christian legacy without giving
any consideration to the relevant historical context.
In fact, a proper
understanding of the Judaeo-Christian historical context is also
crucial for understanding the significance of the contributions
of Islam to world history and human civilization. The
Judaeo-Christian tradition had been influenced and shaped by the
environments, conditions, and cultures in which it had existed.
By the seventh century C.E., this influence had distorted the
original divine message revealed to Moses and Jesus beyond
recognition. The poor status of women in the Judaeo-Christian
world by the seventh century is just one case in point.
Therefore, there was a great need for a new divine message that
would guide humanity back to the straight path. The Quran
described the mission of the new Messenger as a release for Jews
and Christians from the heavy burdens that had been upon them:
"Those who follow the Messenger, the unlettered Prophet, whom
they find mentioned in their own Scriptures--In the Law and the
Gospel-- For he commands them what is just and forbids them what
is evil; he allows them as lawful what is good and prohibits
them from what is bad; He releases them from their heavy burdens
and from the yokes that are upon them" (7:157).
Therefore, Islam should
not be viewed as a rival tradition to Judaism or Christianity.
It has to be regarded as the consummation, completion, and
perfection of the divine messages that had been revealed before
it.
At the end of this study,
I would like to offer the following advice to the global Muslim
community. So many Muslim women have been denied their basic
Islamic rights for so long. The mistakes of the past have to be
corrected. To do that is not a favor, it is a duty incumbent
upon all Muslims. The worldwide Muslim community have to issue a
charter of Muslim women's rights based on the instructions of
the Quran and the teachings of the Prophet of Islam. This
charter must give Muslim women all the rights endowed to them by
their Creator. Then, all the necessary means have to be
developed in order to ensure the proper implementation of the
charter. This charter is long overdue, but it is better late
than never. If Muslims worldwide will not guarantee the full
Islamic rights of their mothers, wives, sisters, and daughters,
who else will ?
Furthermore, we must have
the courage to confront our past and reject outright the
traditions and customs of our forefathers whenever they
contravene the precepts of Islam. Did the Quran not severely
criticize the pagan Arabs for blindly following the traditions
of their ancestors? On the other hand, we have to develop a
critical attitude towards whatever we receive from the West or
from any other culture. Interaction with and learning from other
cultures is an invaluable experience. The Quran has succinctly
considered this interaction as one of the purposes of creation:
" O mankind We created you from a single pair of a male and a
female, and made you into nations and tribes, that you may know
each other" (49:13). It goes without saying, however, that blind
imitation of others is a sure sign of an utter lack of
self-esteem.
It is to the non-Muslim
reader, Jewish, Christian, or otherwise, that these final words
are dedicated. It is bewildering why the religion that had
revolutionized the status of women is being singled out and
denigrated as so repressive of women. This perception about
Islam is one of the most widespread myths in our world today.
This myth is being perpetuated by a ceaseless barrage of
sensational books, articles, media images, and Hollywood movies.
The inevitable outcome of these incessant misleading images has
been total misunderstanding and fear of anything related to
Islam. This negative portrayal of Islam in the world media has
to end if we are to live in a world free from all traces of
discrimination, prejudice, and misunderstanding. Non-Muslims
ought to realize the existence of a wide gap between Muslims'
beliefs and practices and the simple fact that the actions of
Muslims do not necessarily represent Islam. To label the status
of women in the Muslim world today as "Islamic" is as far from
the truth as labelling the position of women in the West today
as "Judaeo-Christian". With this understanding in mind, Muslims
and non-Muslims should start a process of communication and
dialogue in order to remove all misconceptions, suspicions, and
fears. A peaceful future for the human family necessitates such
a dialogue.
Islam should be viewed as
a religion that had immensely improved the status of women and
had granted them many rights that the modern world has
recognized only this century. Islam still has so much to offer
today's woman: dignity, respect, and protection in all aspects
and all stages of her life from birth until death in addition to
the recognition, the balance, and means for the fulfilment of
all her spiritual, intellectual, physical, and emotional needs.
No wonder most of those who choose to become Muslims in a
country like Britain are women. In the U.S. women converts to
Islam outnumber male converts 4 to 1. 85 Islam has so much to
offer our world which is in great need of moral guidance and
leadership. Ambassador Herman Eilts, in a testimony in front of
the committee on Foreign Affairs of the House of Representatives
of the United States Congress on June 24th, 1985, said, "The
Muslim community of the globe today is in the neighbourhood of
one billion. That is an impressive figure. But what to me is
equally impressive is that Islam today is the fastest growing
monotheistic religion. This is something we have to take into
account. Something is right about Islam. It is attracting a good
many people." Yes, something is right about Islam and it is time
to find that out. I hope this study is a step on this direction.
NOTES
1. The Globe and Mail,
Oct. 4,1994.
2. Leonard J. Swidler,
Women in Judaism: the Status of Women in Formative Judaism
(Metuchen, N.J: Scarecrow Press, 1976) p. 115.
3. Thena Kendath,
"Memories of an Orthodox youth" in Susannah Heschel, ed. On
being a Jewish Feminist (New York: Schocken Books, 1983), pp.
96-97.
4. Swidler, op. cit., pp.
80-81.
5. Rosemary R. Ruether,
"Christianity", in Arvind Sharma, ed., Women in World Religions
(Albany: State University of New York Press, 1987) p. 209.
6. For all the sayings of
the prominent Saints, see Karen Armstrong, The Gospel According
to Woman (London: Elm Tree Books, 1986) pp. 52-62. See also
Nancy van Vuuren, The Subversion of Women as Practiced by
Churches, Witch-Hunters, and Other Sexists (Philadelphia:
Westminister Press) pp. 28-30.
7. Swidler, op. cit., p.
140.
8. Denise L. Carmody,
"Judaism", in Arvind Sharma, ed., op. cit., p. 197.
9. Swidler, op. cit., p.
137.
10. Ibid., p. 138.
11. Sally Priesand,
Judaism and the New Woman (New York: Behrman House, Inc., 1975)
p. 24.
12. Swidler, op. cit., p.
115.
13. Lesley Hazleton,
Israeli Women The Reality Behind the Myths (New York: Simon and
Schuster, 1977) p. 41.
14. Gage, op. cit. p. 142.
15. Jeffrey H. Togay,
"Adultery," Encyclopaedia Judaica, Vol. II, col. 313. Also, see
Judith Plaskow, Standing Again at Sinai: Judaism from a Feminist
Perspective (New York: Harper & Row Publishers, 1990) pp.
170-177.
16. Hazleton, op. cit.,
pp. 41-42.
17. Swidler, op. cit., p.
141.
18. Matilda J. Gage,
Woman, Church, and State (New York: Truth Seeker Company, 1893)
p. 141.
19. Louis M. Epstein, The
Jewish Marriage Contract (New York: Arno Press, 1973) p. 149.
20. Swidler, op. cit., p.
142.
21. Epstein, op. cit., pp.
164-165.
22. Ibid., pp. 112-113.
See also Priesand, op. cit., p. 15.
23. James A. Brundage,
Law, Sex, and Christian Society in Medieval Europe ( Chicago:
University of Chicago Press, 1987) p. 88.
24. Ibid., p. 480.
25. R. Thompson, Women in
Stuart England and America (London: Routledge & Kegan Paul,
1974) p. 162.
26. Mary Murray, The Law
of the Father (London: Routledge, 1995) p. 67.
27. Gage, op. cit., p.
143.
28. For example, see
Jeffrey Lang, Struggling to Surrender, (Beltsville, MD: Amana
Publications, 1994) p. 167.
29. Elsayyed Sabiq, Fiqh
al Sunnah (Cairo: Darul Fatah lile'lam Al-Arabi, 11th edition,
1994), vol. 2, pp. 218-229.
30. Abdel-Haleem Abu
Shuqqa, Tahreer al Mar'aa fi Asr al Risala (Kuwait: Dar al
Qalam, 1990) pp. 109-112.
31. Leila Badawi, "Islam",
in Jean Holm and John Bowker, ed., Women in Religion (London:
Pinter Publishers, 1994) p. 102.
32. Amir H. Siddiqi,
Studies in Islamic History (Karachi: Jamiyatul Falah
Publications, 3rd edition, 1967) p. 138.
33. Epstein, op. cit., p.
196.
34. Swidler, op. cit., pp.
162-163.
35. The Toronto Star, Apr.
8, 1995.
36. Sabiq, op. cit., pp.
318-329. See also Muhammad al Ghazali, Qadaya al Mar'aa bin al
Taqaleed al Rakida wal Wafida (Cairo: Dar al Shorooq, 4th
edition, 1992) pp. 178-180.
37. Ibid., pp. 313-318.
38. David W. Amram, The
Jewish Law of Divorce According to Bible and Talmud (
Philadelphia: Edward Stern & CO., Inc., 1896) pp. 125-126.
39. Epstein, op. cit., p.
219.
40. Ibid, pp 156-157.
41. Muhammad Abu Zahra,
Usbu al Fiqh al Islami (Cairo: al Majlis al A'la li Ri'ayat al
Funun, 1963) p. 66.
42. Epstein, op. cit., p.
122.
43. Armstrong, op. cit.,
p. 8.
44. Epstein, op. cit., p.
175.
45. Ibid., p. 121.
46. Gage, op. cit., p.
142.
47. B. Aisha Lemu and
Fatima Heeren, Woman in Islam (London: Islamic Foundation, 1978)
p. 23.
48. Hazleton, op. cit.,
pp. 45-46.
49. Ibid., p. 47.
50. Ibid., p. 49.
51. Swidler, op. cit., pp.
144-148.
52. Hazleton, op. cit., pp
44-45.
53. Eugene Hillman,
Polygamy Reconsidered: African Plural Marriage and the Christian
Churches (New York: Orbis Books, 1975) p. 140.
54. Ibid., p. 17.
55. Ibid., pp. 88-93.
56. Ibid., pp. 92-97.
57. Philip L. Kilbride,
Plural Marriage For Our Times (Westport, Conn.: Bergin & Garvey,
1994) pp. 108-109.
58. The Weekly Review,
Aug. 1, 1987.
59. Kilbride, op. cit., p.
126.
60. John D'Emilio and
Estelle B. Freedman, Intimate Matters: A history of Sexuality in
America (New York: Harper & Row Publishers, 1988) p. 87.
61. Ute Frevert, Women in
German History: from Bourgeois Emancipation to Sexual Liberation
(New York: Berg Publishers, 1988) pp. 263-264.
62. Ibid., pp. 257-258.
63. Sabiq, op. cit., p.
191.
64. Hillman, op. cit., p.
12.
65. Nathan Hare and Julie
Hare, ed., Crisis in Black Sexual Politics (San Francisco: Black
Think Tank, 1989) p. 25.
66. Ibid., p. 26.
67. Kilbride, op. cit., p.
94.
68. Ibid., p. 95.
69. Ibid.
70. Ibid., pp. 95-99.
71. Ibid., p. 118.
72. Lang, op. cit., p.
172.
73. Kilbride, op. cit.,
pp. 72-73.
74. Sabiq, op. cit., pp.
187-188.
75. Abdul Rahman Doi,
Woman in Shari'ah (London: Ta-Ha Publishers, 1994) p. 76.
76. Menachem M. Brayer,
The Jewish Woman in Rabbinic Literature: A Psychosocial
Perspective (Hoboken, N.J: Ktav Publishing House, 1986) p. 239.
77. Ibid., pp. 316-317.
Also see Swidler, op. cit., pp. 121-123.
78. Ibid., p. 139.
79. Susan W. Schneider,
Jewish and Female (New York: Simon & Schuster, 1984) p. 237.
80. Ibid., pp. 238-239.
81. Alexandra Wright,
"Judaism", in Holm and Bowker, ed., op. cit., pp. 128-129
82. Clara M. Henning,
"Cannon Law and the Battle of the Sexes" in Rosemary R. Ruether,
ed., Religion and Sexism: Images of Woman in the Jewish and
Christian Traditions (New York: Simon and Schuster, 1974) p.
272.
83. Donald B. Kraybill,
The riddle of the Amish Culture (Baltimore: Johns Hopkins
University Press, 1989) p. 56.
84. Khalil Gibran,
Thoughts and Meditations (New York: Bantam Books, 1960) p. 28.
85. The Times, Nov. 18,
1993.
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